wish.

wish you could hear my voice screaming your name. wish you could sense what i feel. wish you could give what i could give. wish you could see what i do. wish you could appreciate what i exert. i do this because of three words polluting my mind whenever i think of you.these three words often hinders me from thinking of other things, just you. i just want to get rid of this. but in return, it keeps coming back and stronger each time it does. i don't know what to do. help. would you be the one?

// it's hard to admit. but i LOVE YOU. //

now that i'm idle and have nothing to do, i keep telling myself about what we ALMOST had. what we ALMOST shared. and what we ALMOST loved for. almost because i can sense nothing from us before. just a plain game. i put myself onto the edge where i can fall so easily. bad i did that because it happened. i hate the times you showed things i would believe that may never happen in OUR life. i hate those times that i keep on FEELING that i REALLY REALLY love you. i would die. but instead, i hung myself in the middle of nowhere just not to feel the anger, and the hurt you gave me. :(

// i REGRET that i MET you. //

i had a question in my mind. i loved you, right? but the consequences came. and they were telling me NOT to LOVE you anymore. i resisted. but i regretted what i did. it's the opportunity to OFFICIALLY let you go and move on. but how weird and stupid i am. i kept loving you. and in return, there's NOTHING. i REALLY REALLY HATE YOU!

// you're an effin *. grr~ //

i thought of you as an angel. but deep inside, you're an EVIL. it makes my blood boiling. and each time i think of it, i just want to KILL you. but i can't want to know why? simply because I STILL LOVE YOU. period. and i SINCERELY HATE IT.
// here comes a girl wants you. //

i would give you to HER. if i would prove she's the DESERVING one. :(

// in short. i LOVE you but i WANT TO LET YOU GO. //

just got bu.sy.

oh my gosh. it's been a long day. this day is it.

oh my gosh// we're preparing. for that bazaar. because we had an international bazaar for the celebration of the united nations day. haha. we've prepared our stall for our country is united states of america. hai. i get so excited. :))

well. until here first. i'll be having other things to do. :)

i wish i'm not this tired.

i wish i would be as great as you. as mighty as you. as lovable as you. as the best as you.

i am neither perplexed, or attenuated. but i think neither of them fits me in this state. i rattle like a child. i party wild. i love to play games. i love to blog. but when study time, gosh. i would rather keep quiet and let them talk as much as they want until their throats go off. *how bad i am.*  anyway. some other way. i want this ruined life be finished. not to die. but to start everything again. with the capital A-G-A-I-N. i want to remove all their fears and pressures they want on me. i don't like them to expect. just to wander.  go with the flow. hm.

' -- STRESSED DAY. -- '

oh no!

i got older again. :( oh no not again.

i have nothing to do. it is an inevitable day. ;( but it's alright. i found myself happy in that day.//
i thought i will be a loner that time because i wanna go somewhere else, and that' not school. hai. if i would have time to make things right. :))

anyway, thanks to the persons who greeted me. :) love yea. :)

it is fun, right?

volunteering is real fun. :D

i love to help. love it. soooo much. haha :D i was unable to share it to the blog last friday because i had no connection. gosh. i love to tell everything i made there but the connection broke. anyway. last oct1, we went to lasalle manila to contribute some manpower thing in order to help for the victims of Ondoy. we carried some boxes, sorted out things, counted and counted. i mean we COUNTED every single thing we see there. haha. :D

even though i have no goods brought, i still contributed. i love it. :D

inevitable moment.

it's finally october!!

woohoo! i looooooove it. :D after september, there's october // christmas is already coming. yipee! i love the presents. i love everything that arise when christmas is near. the shopping. the treats. the everything.

of course, sometimes, i also hated october. it's the time i'm getting old. gosh. i can't imagine that i will be turning six-teen by the 15th. crap. know what i'm sayin'? i love being fif-teen. but why do we need to get old? whatever. i want to grow up. but i don't want to grow old. dude. i know i'm selfih, but i want to convey the truth. the truth that i don't want to grow freaking old.

well, everything's inevitable. need to accept it.

hey wait, there's more. if you intend to give me gifts, that would be fine. gifts are good, but i need cash. haha! :D kidding dude. LOL.

haha. :D

this thing.

i really reaaaally love this kind of thing!

the background of my blog. :) haha! :D i loooooove the piano design. haha! :)

i loooove this may be because i looooove music. :)

that's may be why i love the music 'bella's lullaby'. i sincerely love it. i go crazy all over it. i first heard it when i watched the movie 'twilight'. how handsome edward cullen was. how beautiful isabella swan turned out. their characters are perfect for the song. [song because i dunnow how i would call it. just music maybe?] anyway. here's the piece edward played in piano for bella. i thought this wasn't the music in the movie but it is. i have also the one that has been distributed all over the our place. and it's totally different with this one. well. enjoy. :)